Herispeak

“Push….puuuush harder” I was pushing harder…why did it seem to her that I wasn’t? I was giving it all I had for heaven’s sake!!! “Just one more push…take a deep breath and push again” She was beginning to annoy me. It was as if she was telling me that I wasn’t doing a good job. Yet here I was giving it the push of my life. I was pushing so hard it felt as if all my insides would burst out through my “you-know-what”. Did I tell you about the pain? No? Allow me to. It was horrendous. If only women could get a sneak preview into what this kind of pain felt like…I think there are a good number of us who would run in the opposite direction and never have a baby. I am screaming…neigh…yelling the hell out of my lungs but it almost feels like am doing it in my head ….like the pain is too much that even a scream cannot do it justice. Finally, I feel it pop out. Sorry…him. HIM. I feel my baby come out of my insides in a sudden gash of fluids. Just like that…the awful, horrendous pain is gone. I

Dear Diary, It is hard to believe that it is a year since I became a middle-aged bride  (Laughs out loud) . It has been pretty eventful and I can breathe a sigh of relief. We made it! You see, it wasn't easy. I have always been under the impression that the first year of marriage is naturally the easiest...you know....filled with sunny lovey-dovey moments as you both skip into the sunset of a happily ever after future. Don't they even call it the honeymoon year? Honeymoon shmazimoon! That is not what not awaited me. Like I mentioned in The Ugly (see previous post), I had a difficult time adjusting to the move and so much to handle in other areas of my life that I just sunk deeply into this not-so-happy place. As I struggled to come out of it, an unexpected challenge one evening brought an end to that season. To help my son settle into our new home and cope with the changes, we had gotten him a puppy which he named Scott. Scott is a Havamalt (a mix between a Havanese and